Category: Let's talk
I just received this in an e-mail from a friend of mine who's at the convent, and I wasn't sure whether to post it here or in the writer's block section. Anyway, read and enjoy. I will appear in the next post.
A friend of mine opened his wife's underwear drawer and picked up a silk paper wrapped package:
"This", he said "isn't any ordinary package."
He unwrapped the box and stared at both the silk paper and the box.
"She got this the first time we went to New York , 8 or 9 years ago. She has never put it on and was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this
is it. He got near the bed and placed the gift box next to the other clothing's he was taking to the funeral house. His wife had just died. He turned to
me and said,
"Never save something for a special occasion. Every day in your life is a special occasion."
I still think those words changed my life.
Now I read more and clean less.
I sit on the porch without worrying about anything.
I spend more time with my family and less at work.
I understand that life should be a source of experience to be lived up to, not survived through. I no longer keep anything. I use crystal glasses every
day. I'll wear new clothes to go to the supermarket, if I feel like it.
I don't save my special perfume for special occasions, I use it whenever I want to. The words "Someday..." and "One Day..." are fading away from my dictionary.
If it's worth seeing, listening or doing, I want to see, listen or do it now. I don't know what my friend's wife would have done if she knew she wouldn't
be there the next morning. This nobody can tell. I think she might have called her relatives and closest friends.
She might call old friends to make peace over past quarrels. I'd like to think she would go out for Chinese, her favorite food. It's these small things
that I would regret not doing, if I knew my time had come.
I would regret it, because I would no longer see the friends I would meet, letters that I wanted to write.. "One of these days".
I would regret and feel sad, because I didn't say to my brother and sisters, son and daughters, not enough times at least, how much
I love them.
Now, I try not to delay, postpone or keep anything that could bring laughter and joy into our hearts & lives.
And on each morning, I say to myself that this could be a special day.
Each day, each hour, each minute, is special.
If you got this, it's because someone cares for you and because, probably, there's someone you care about.
If you're too busy to send this out to other people and you say to yourself that you will send it "One of these days" , remember that "One day" is far
away... or may never come.
No matter if you're superstitious or not, spend some time reading it.
It holds useful messages for the soul.
We surely live in the world of instant gratification and we have a million ways of justifying it.
If we always did whatever we wanted as spur of the moment wouldn't it take away some of what is special about those things in the first place. If you eat your favorite food every day it won't be your favorite food for long, if every day is special, how can we have extra special days? Deciding that some occasion are worth waiting for and are more special than others is both natural and, to me, make life more, not less, special.
So I don't necessarily disagree with the last post completely but I think so much emphasis is constantly being placed on doing whatever you wannt without patience or regards to whether it's sacred or not, is becoming more and more of popular and, speaking for myself, I don't really feel it's always right.
You both have valid points. And are each right to some extent.
Wb's idea of eating your favorite food every day boils down to the question of "when does the unique become mundane." and Nymphodora's original article reminds us that it's better to do something that to always plan on doing it.
One lesson I draw from this is that there's never a good time to die, no matter how much you plan, so why plan at all.
Bob
I'm with Wildebrew on this one. There is much that is beautiful and thought-provoking in the piece, and I can understand why Joanne considered it worth passing along, but the whole don't-worry-be-happy philosophy is, ultimately, dead wrong. Why plan at all, Bob? Because unless we do, we'll all drown in our own excrement, which is pretty much where we seem to be headed.
This is really thought provoking. It was a very nice message. I really like the message, but there should always be a balance between doing what you want and handling responsibilities. Planning is a good thing, but sometimes its nice to let one day go by without worrying about anything. I do that onces in awhile, its really relaxing. As for the previous posters, yeah, you all make good points about the message.
I'm not much into modern music, but this reminds me of a song and a story. It's called If Tomorrow Never Comes. I'll never forget the promotion for that song. It was a true story about a father who lost his daughter. I can't remember all the words to the song, having only heard it a few times, but I know it was written for her. As everyone has said, I think there are valid points in both sides. I, for one, am a huge procrastinator, and I'm very lazy. This means that I have no rhyme or reason, no plans for anything. Only very rarely will I make a plan and stick to it. I need more discipline in my life. But I can still see the joy in doing things spontaniously, in taking something special, every once in awhile, and doing it just because... Sometimes, for example, I'll write something special for Mom and when I was little, Joanie and I used to make her breakfast in bed just to show her how much we loved her. But on the other hand, I do think some things should be saved. I always wanted to go to Astoria New York, because of it's huge Greek population. I'd asked everyone to take me, dreamed of what it would be like, what I'd buy etc. Well, my boyfriend took me there, but for different reasons, we had to keep going there. This went on, sometimes once and sometimes twice a weekend, for two months or more. He took me to this wonderful Duncan Doughnuts where alot of the older people would hang out and I loved it. But after awhile, I didn't wanna go anymore, and eventually, we stopped. Now that it's a little harder for us to see each other on the weekends and because he doesn't have to go there on those days, I miss Astoria and that Duncan Doughnuts. And that story about the man and his wife seriously made me cry. I'm not much of a cryer, but for some reason, death and the possibilities of what could have been always gets to me in that way.
It's a good message and has merit regarding not holding back in telling those you care about how special they are and sometimes it's fun to do something impulsive, but at other times there has to be a balance, because, as someone stated here those special things wouldn't be so special if you did them all the time or ate your particular favorite food every day. so, I guess the key word here is balance.
I agree with Jaguar. I think it’s about clarifying what is truly important in your life. If you never got to eat your favorite food again, would it really matter in the long run, probably not. However, not being able to tell a loved one just what they meant to you, well, that can’t be replaced.
My wife’s mother unexpectantly passed away a little over a month ago. The one thing my wife said was that her mom had talked to all three of her children the day before she died, and the last thing she said to each of them was “I love you.” I am forever thankful that each of the kids heard that statement before their mom died.
I have a very very close friend who is dying right now, very slowly, and a little more of him goes away every day. I believe you, Joanne, and what makes me cry about this is that he lives far away, and going to see him is a "some day." Because I will never see him. but live every moment like you really mean it, feel the life, don't ever take _anything for granted. love life no matter what happens, because tomorrow you might be gone. Dream and let dreams come true, live and be happy, always, because every moment could be your last. those who say omly save things for a special occasion do not have friends, dearly loved ones, who are dying do they, or who will die. but if you think on it we are all dying, and it is merely a matter of time for all of us because the future is unpredictable. Love everything, never let an opportunity pass you by, open your eyes, open your mind, and live as much as you possibly can while you know you can.